Show me your stuff.

After yesterday’s post I found myself thinking “geez all 5 readers are going to think I’m super shallow for focusing on stuff.”  So I thought I’d back up to one of the reasons I dwell on “have nothing you do not know to be useful or believe to beautiful”… what your stuff says about you. We are a culture that loves horoscopes, personality tests, quizzes (like this latest one VisualDNA) and articles that categorize, organize, and stereotype.  Tell me about myself because I don’t really know myself.  I think I know myself, but I’m curious what others think. I don’t really believe in astrology but hey wait a minute that does sound a little bit like me!

So, this isn’t about whether your home says you’ve got an eclectic, traditional, global or whatever style. It is about what your stuff (or lack thereof) says about you, and how authentically it represents who you are. Because we’re all putting ourselves out there in the world as one thing or another, through what we do and say, the things and people we surround ourselves with. And the closer I am to representing myself authentically, the more comfortable I’m going to be and the better others will know me. Authenticity is my goal. (Granted, I have to hope that my authentic self is not sociopath or repulsive.)

Back to stuff. Have you ever seen celebrity home photos and thought “huh, THAT’s unexpected?”  I remember seeing photos of Britney Spears’ home (not these, but close enough) and being confused. Because not only did it not match her public persona, it didn’t seem to say anything. Home decorators r’us.  Hotel decor. Drew Barrymore’s office, on the other hand, appears to actually have a personality and may even tell you something about her.

To be fair, I may be biased because I can see myself happily hanging out at Drew’s pad while itching to ditch Britney’s. But the glaring difference between the two is that one looks occupied, not just decorated. It’s archaeology. If someone from the future visited your home, what would they guess about how you live, how you occupy your time?  Back to the ex: Bed. TV in bedroom. Unused dining table. Empty walls. Travels a lot? (Probably would have some travel stuff) Lonely? (Maybe.) Poor student, sold all belongings? (Probably would still have sentimental items.)  I love where they find bits and pieces of detritus and go “oh a blacksmith and an artist with four kids lived here. They liked to play board games made with rocks and sticks.”

Now, I’m not advocating for stuff just to have stuff.  I respect those who live a lean, frugal lifestyle. Sometimes I consider selling everything and traveling the world. I have more than one friend who abides by the policy of owning only what he can carry on his back. But these guys pick their stuff carefully –useful or beautiful applies–you can get a picture of who they are in 30 seconds or less, that memento that gives away a sentimental streak or attachment, the book that shows their literary preferences (sci-fi guy? closet Austen reader? political?), the absence of any technology also telling a story. I mentioned this in an earlier post when talking about the attention to detail in the film Amelie. And I’m definitely not advocating for lots of stuff, although I find hoarders and bargain hunters fascinating.

What I am saying is you can tell a lot about a person by looking at their stuff, just like looking at their friends.  That I appreciate when something has a story, character, beauty, personal value. That while I can appreciate a good deal at Ikea, I’m more impressed by the awesome table you inherited from your grandmother that still has burn marks from the baked Alaska incident. Hopefully it says not only you love your family, you love a good story. That I think you should pass up that great deal if you don’t get that feeling of “OMG it’s so me” when you look at it, no matter how great of a deal it is (unless you say “OMG it’s so Rachel” and buy it for me). That if your home is global style I hope it’s because you have meaningful souvenirs scored while traveling, like that awesome handmade mask from Bali, or because you’re dying to see the world and have a map on the wall of every place you want to go. Not because you saw a photo spread in Elle of a global style home and thought it looked groovy, even though you have no desire to leave your zip code. No matter how gorgeous, if it’s not authentically you, you won’t be comfortable in it and neither will those around you. If you have a wall of books organized by color, I hope it’s because you read (useful, beautiful) not just because it looked cool on that website so you got some red books to line up.

Oh and I’m an Aquarius, an INTP, my decorating style is eclectic, and my VisualDNA is Culture Conscious. Among other things.  I actually received a very nice gift one time that I felt obligated to keep at first, but its inauthenticity screamed at me so loudly from the drawer it had been shoved in that I finally gave it away. And could breath again. Here’s a little bit of my stuff. What story is it telling you?

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